some lessons I've learned about china/living abroad/myself in the last three and a half months

1) I'll start with the saddest: holidays abroad are tough. I definitely should have thought a little longer about jumping for a job in a country that doesn't officially celebrate Christmas. At least it's on a weekend this year, next year it's a Monday and I'll probably have to teach! My birthday was my first "holiday" over here, but I didn't really pay attention because I was in the most pain of my life, in my face, and had to get a root canal a few days later. Thanksgiving was not so bad, because we all cooked and celebrated on Friday so I got to lay around casually prepping until dinnner. Christmas, though, is going to be the kicker. I already cried listening to my first Christmas song of the season (granted, I made it Judy Garland's "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas"), and I can't listen to "I'll Be Home for Christmas" sometimes because that's what I would always listen to on my way home from Tulsa for the holidays. I did buy some decorations and cards to send, but it's too warm outside for it to be Christmas. If I can make it to, let's say December 27 without crying, it will be my Christmas miracle. Out of habit, all the native teachers still talk about "going home for Christmas", even though we won't leave until late January. Any extra prayers for me during the coming weeks will be appreciated, because it's going to be a hard time for me, I know, and my family at home.

2) Now onto the funnier: when crossing the street in China, cross with a local whenever possible; I feel like they're less inclined to hit their own kind. When this is possible, use them as a human shield, crossing on the opposite side from the direction of oncoming vehicles. Pedestrians literally never have the right of way, because traffic laws are not enforced at all. Cars and buses will cut in turn lane lines, and my favorite is when they get sick of waiting at a red light and just drive on through. Some intersections have crossing signals, but they go green when oncoming traffic is also green, so you just can't rely on them. I've developed a kind of sixth traffic sense, and have learned how to read 3 to 4 different sets of traffic signals at once to judge when I can most safely cross. The general rule of thumb is to cross when you can, where you can. They have a tendency to put the crosswalk in the widest part of the intersection, so I just walk back a bit until the road narrows so it's safer. I can even cross roads in the dark now, I'm very proud of myself.

3) Central heating is such a blessing, and I didn't realize it until I came here. BY LAW, public buildings south of the Yangtze River are not allowed to have central heat or air. This is fine in the apartment, since my mom doesn't turn on the heat unless we have company. However, in the States they would cancel class if the heat was off, so I am not used to working, teaching in a classroom that just absorbs all the cold and holds it within its concrete walls. I can't really dress cute anymore because I have to wear at least a scarf and jacket, sometimes a hat. If I have to write on the board much, I lose feeling in my fingers. I'm about to break down and buy a space heater to tote to class with me, it's that bad.

4) The internet is really fantastic, more fantastic than I ever thought. Most people probably don't know, but I get to talk to my mom everyday. Because of the time difference and the fact that most of my friends are still in school, I don't see them online or on skype as much, but I'm sure that will change come summer. It's just really cool.

5) I really hate spiders. I can handle roaches and mosquitoes and other flying buzzing things, but spiders are too much. I found one on the wall in the spare bedroom last night that was so big, it's eyeballs reflected the camera flash when I took a picture. It makes my heart stop, and then I'm freaked out for days. I hope we move into the new apartments soon so I can stop having to deal with them.

6) In contrast, I really love cheese. Cheese is not common here, and they make Chinese cheese but it's overprocessed and fake tasting, it's just depressing. So as a cheese-lover, I have to break down, splurge, and spend $6 U.S. on a little block of real American, Land-O-Lakes cheese. Metro has a really good foreign import selection, so if I ever feel really crazy, I can buy cheese from Switzerland or Ireland, or even a giant, very expensive wheel of cheese.

7) Chinese cough syrup is gross. Their sense of good hygiene is different here (i.e. not as much handwashing, virtually nonexistent covering of mouths and noses when coughing/sneezing), and the weather has been yoyo-ing, so pretty much all of the foreign teachers have been sick over the past week. I have had a cough that was making me sore from hacking so often, so I finally broke down last night, went to the Chinese pharmacy and got some cough syrup. I think it's working, but it's really disgusting.

8) "Polite" is relative. People can complain all they want about Chinese culture and how they should act a certain way, but I try to remind myself that they were not brought up being taught the same etiquette that we were in the West. Some argue that the Chinese should do things more our way if they know they're dealing with Westerners, and that foreign people shouldn't put up with the Chinese way, but going all militant on this point does not change the fact that they were raised differently. Can I note the differences between the cultures, and do those differences irk me sometimes? Yes. Am I going to make a big deal out of it? No way. No matter how much some foreigners want us to stand up for the "Western way", it's not going to change the culture, so it's not going to be permanent. I know I'm on a soapbox, but I've had to deal with some of this, and I like to think not that I'm a pushover, but rather that I know I'm not going to win a fight with the whole of Chinese culture and etiquette.

We're past halfway done with the semester, and I have less than two months until I come home for two short weeks. Is it bad that I'm already looking forward to summer and the next fall semester?